back when i was in community college my teacher told us the story of a girl in his class who wanted to have sex with her boyfriend but they didnt have any lube so they used mayonnaise. fast forward a couple of days and she’s getting random orgasms during class and driving places so she goes to the doctor and they check her out and guess what they found
okay ill tell you it was maggots. maggots were in her vagina giving her orgasms.
why do people still say “frickle frackle”. you can say the word sex, no one’s gonna take away your juice box and send you to timeout
heck you fricker
thats it, no more fruit punch for meta18
what the fuck
if you’re reading this i love you and i believe in you
this just in: ryan nosdrinker hates the illiterate and the blind
I hate that they cut this
#this is why she doesn’t like magic #she may have been jealous when she was younger #but we never knew her when she was older and accepted her sister as a witch #she saw the bad in magic whereas everyone else only saw the good #she probably thought if she could keep harry from magic she wouldn’t have to remember losing her sister every time she saw him #she was also bullied by snape using magic when she was younger #it probably killed her to find out snape was one of the people behind her sisters death when lily trusted him so much
Literally nothing good came from magic for Petunia. First Lily being magical meant they were separated like nine months out of the year. Second her sister got married and moved to a magical village. Third, the one other magical person that Petunia knew got her sister killed. The end.
No no no no no stop it
Stop trying to make me pity/love characters I don’t likeyou should be happy to know that a character has depth
someone posted this on facebook and i can’t believe i’m still laughing i’m sooo ashamed
FIRST KISS: We asked twenty strangers to kiss for the first time…
"What’s your name again?"
Had to be there, I guess.
I’m at the grocery store with my grandparents and my grandpa has wandered away and now my grandma is going up every isle yelling his name and im hiding behind a cookie display cuz i dont want anyone to know im with the crazy woman screaming dick at the top of her lungs
you cant spell dad without a
without a what
without a what